Wednesday, March 5, 2008

The adoption process for us.

Lately, this adoption process seems like the most exhausting experience our family has ever been through. Not only for Garrett and me, but also for our extended family. This will probably be one of the longest posts for us, so if you do not have some time on your hands now, you better wait and tune in later.

We have been pursuing our adoption with Dillon International since fall of 2005. How can it be, that it is March 2008, and we still do not have our child? This is the question that we get on a daily basis. I thought I might try to explain the process, from OUR experience. We did most of our paperwork, attending classes, Dr.'s appointments for all 4 family members, home study appointments,etc. during 2006. We were placed on the waiting list for a girl Feb. 14, 2007. Most families wait 6-9 months on the waiting list for girls.(Although this time frame has recently been changed to 12-15 months). We waited just over 7mths, and received our referral for Nguyen Thi My Van on September 20, 2007. What a day for our family. (This is also Garrett's Grandmother's birthday). We learned on that day that our little girl had been born on July 13, 2007. She was tiny, but had an uneventful birth and was otherwise healthy. We named her Claire Addison My Prevo. We wanted to keep one of her Vietnamese names as a middle name. (what is so ironic is that her initials are CAMP. That is what we were doing on July 13th and 14th. camping at the lake. Little did we know, that our little girl had been born on the other side of the world). From the time of referral, families have an additional wait of 3-6 mths before travel. During this time, documents are gathered for the child, and sent back and forth between officials in Vietnam. There is a 12 step process for this. Step 12 is your giving and receiving ceremony. (A giving and receiving ceremony is where you stand in front of Vietnamese officials, maybe the director of the orphanage, and pledge to care for this child for the rest of it's life. Then sign some papers, and you are done. For most people the G&R, is very quick and simple).
This is where we are. We are at step 12. We are working with our agency and the orphanage director in An Giang to schedule our giving and receiving date. We were told last week that we could have her on the 13th or 14th, but we are still waiting on our I-600 approval,(this gives us the necessary paperwork to get Claire's VISA to enter the USA) and so we are trying to get our date pushed back a week or so. It also helps that Garrett has about 12 scheduled days off of work for spring break, and he would not have to use his sick/personal days to go to Vietnam. He would be able to use these days when we get home.
We have run into some problems lately, that has made this a draining process. There was an error on our I-600 case. We were missing a document, and the US embassy informed our agency of the situation in November of 2007. Our agency did not inform us, so our case sat "untouched" for about 55 days. It was not until we started calling the embassy in Vietnam that we were informed of the problem. Although everyone makes mistakes, this mistakes has cost us an additional month or longer. We are not "mad" at our agency, this experience has just taught us to be very proactive in our own paperwork. We don't take any one's word that things are getting done, we make sure of it!
People ask us all the time, would we do it again? or Will we adopt again? Yes, even with all the exhaustion, emotions, and up's and down's, we would do it again in a heartbeat. It will ALL be worth it in the end! Will we adopt again? I think Claire COMPLETES our family. I will never say never, but we feel truly blessed with three.
All kinds of families have all kinds of experiences, but this is ours. Adoption is truly a roller coaster of emotions. All we can say about that is, keep your eye on the prize. Trust me, we have to remind ourselves of that everyday. After all this waiting is over, what a gift we will have.

9 comments:

Bob said...

Sending hugs your way! It has been a long process, hasn't it? I pray for peace and strength for you and your family.
Carla C

Heather said...

I'm so sorry that you have had paperwork glitches. Everything has changed since we went through the process - though, being the guinea pigs, we had our share of hurdles. I hope that you will be on your way very soon to meet your precious daughter. Yes, keep your eye on the prize - she will be worth it.

Unknown said...

Beautifully written! I pray you get your I-600 approval ASAP and can travel ASAP. I'm looking forward to seeing Miss Claire in your arms!
Shelly C

Meredith said...

Gosh, what a rough time you've had!! You deserve to be in Vietnam with that beautiful girl in your arms ASAP.

Meredith from Dillon

Heather M. said...

I know...I was just telling a friend over lunch that we started our process in the Fall of our boys' Kindergarten year...now they are finishing up 1st Grade! And, we're just starting our wait for travel! It's a LONG Process!!!! Hang In There...There is a light at the end of the tunnel for each of us!
Heather M.

Leigh said...

Good for you and your positive attitude! It would be easy to be a little bitter in your position, I am thankful you aren't, and that you choose to use your experience to inform and educate others. Yea You!

I can't wait to see your precious boys with their beautiful baby sister! Hang in there!

Jessica said...

I hate to hear that is happening to you. This is the message i have been preachin to PAPs. Do NOT expect Dillon to be responsible with your paperwork. You HAVE to stay on top of them. The in country staff loves to sit on paperwork (we sat at step 1 for over 5 weeks and then at 7 for several as well).

The same goes when you are in Country. Know your stuff so you knwo theya re doing everything right. We actually caught Minh trying to have us fill out our I600 incorrectly. I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't noticed?

Anywho, we are praying for you that this gets straightened out quickly. This happened to us and when they turned in the extra needed docs I think we traveled like 2 weeks later.

Anonymous said...

Hang in there! I am really hoping it all gets straightened out and you get to Claire ASAP!

Unknown said...

Praying the remainder goes smooth I wish all the agencies involved would work together to benefit everyone involved.can't wait to hear of your approval and GNR.
Stormy

Thank You

Thank you so much to all of those people who have been such a huge blessing to us. We know that we would not be where we are today if it were not for you all. We are so blessed.
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